The Danger of Stagnancy

Gender is not only tied to biology, as the term may suggest, but is culturally produced within each society. Both genders are given roles, norms, and ideas about what it is to be a man or a woman, and these roles change based on the culture. Within Sri Lanka, as well as most of the outside world, the feminine is culturally produced within society. This is dangerous to women because it makes gender a stagnant idea, like biology, without recognizing that gender is social and is therefore always developing. Without the ability to develop, both genders are forced into certain roles and ideas that no longer fit the reality of the time. In our course, aptly entitled “Images of the Feminine and the Social Experiences of Sri Lankan Women,” we were able to compare the ideal or imagined roles of women created by the culture to the real experiences of Sri Lankan women. In addition, the course also helped us to understand the imagined verses real Western woman within Sri Lanka, which we experience every day on the streets of Kandy. As a Western woman, I have faced many prejudices and problems within Sri Lanka because of the culturally produced idea of the Western woman, just as Sri Lankan women face hardships trying to fit into and break out of their traditionally seen norms and image.
First, let us discuss the imagined ideal Sri Lankan woman and man, produced by society. The ideal Sri Lankan woman is portrayed as passive, mild-mannered, naive, modest, quiet, emotional, dependent, sacrificial, and religious. She submits to the will of the males in her family and her greatest duty is as a wife and mother. She can make decisions for the family, but only under the thumb of the man. She is chaste until marriage, at which time she only has sex with her husband for procreation and to please him. There is no mention of female sexual needs and women are almost seen as non-sexual beings. At the same time, however, the fact that women are sexual beings is inferred, as women can be seen as tempting men. Although the woman may not be overtly sexual, she is a sexed being that attracts the men with her advances, actions, attire, walk, and by just being a woman, which is why women are supposed to be modestly dressed and protected until marriage.
Conversely, this idea also culturally produces a not-so-ideal image of man as a sexual beast, with an inability to control desires if the woman attracts him. The man cannot control himself, so it is the duty of the family and culture to hide and protect the woman until the appropriate marriageable age. The saying, boys will be boys, also denotes this idea, saying that men need and have to have sexual relations, as a biological necessity to their gender. Because men cannot control themselves, it is accepted that men can and will have sexual relations, and is almost overlooked in the culture. For women, however, one digression or even rumor of such can blacken her name and ruin her life within society. This idea of “boys will be boys” irks me for many reasons. First of all, this is saying that men are no better than beasts, like the stray dogs that run rampant around Kandy. Because of their sexual needs, they cannot control their actions and, therefore, the women must be controlled. This is completely absurd. Control and consciousness is one of the main attributes that separates humans from animals, and gives us the ability to create and sustain as we have. Are we saying that, in reality, this is not so? If a man cannot control his animalistic desires, than how is it possible that he can function in society? Furthermore, should a man even be allowed to take public office with this lack or control, or be allowed to drive a car safely? Animalistic tendencies are not an excuse for animalistic behavior, because we are not animals. Men, too, should be ashamed of this statement, because it attacks their integrity and ability to control themselves. It lowers men into the animal kingdom and, because the idea is culturally produced, they will remain there, unless the society (controlled by men) decides to change it.
Sri Lankan society not only produces images of the Sri Lankan people, but also produces images of the cultural other: the west. Images of the west demonize the western woman. This is, in part, due to colonial ties and media influence. A western woman is seen as the antithesis of the Sri Lankan ideal woman. A western woman is loud, strong, assertive, immodest, too-worldly, easy when it comes to sex, shameless, selfish, and irreligious. She is a threat to the Sri Lankan traditional culture, because she represents the destruction of values and the rise of capitalist materialism. There are many stereotypes of a western woman in Sri Lanka, but two are most prevalent. First is the loose, free woman. This image of the western woman is seen in the media, through western movies, books, etc. The western woman is portrayed as a loose woman, free with her body and sexuality, and always up for sex. She wears revealing clothing, flirts openly, and is inherently asking for sexual intimacy from everyone she meets. She is loud and aggressive, laughing and talking freely to men and in unchaste. She is seen in action movies as the girl in the mini skirt who sleeps with the main character, or the ditsy blonde with large breasts and a tendency to show them off when she consumes alcohol. In films, she is usually sleeping around, always beautiful, and always available. The foreign tourism in Sri Lanka doesn’t help this image much, as white women parade around on the beaches of Galle in slim bikinis and drinks in their hands, and while this isn’t the norm, the minority helps to perpetuate the majority stereotype.
The second view of the western woman is the rich white woman. This stems from past colonial history as well as tourism. Western women, in colonial times, were seen as the Victorian women, placed high on a pedestal in all white. The Victorian housewife was passive and conservative, but also wealthy beyond measure because of her husband. She was seen living in mansions on the beaches of Sri Lanka and having innumerous maids, drivers, and other servants. Colonialism ended with Sri Lankan independence, but the stereotype of the rich white woman remained. This stereotype still rears its head in the shops along Kandy Lake, where the shopkeepers charge double and even triple the prices for white skin; or where touts follow you up and down the street, posing as employees of the Queens or Food City, and trying to lead you into one of their many brothers’ shops for the best deals. Again, the self-portrayal of the suda tourist doesn’t help, with many women carrying expensive-looking hand bags, couture shoes, and top of the line camera. But even those who do not dress and act the part are still placed into this category, being harassed and followed as if rupees will flow out of their pockets and into the streets.
The social construction of both Sri Lankan women and western women is not only highly inaccurate, but it also harmful because it tries to force unique individuals into a narrow and stagnant category that almost no woman fits. Within readings and class discussions, we have learned how the portrayal and cultural production of gender has had harmful effects on Sri Lankan women, so there is no need to delve further into these at this time. However, as a white foreign woman living in Kandy, I believe that I should shed light on the effects the cultural production of western women by Sri Lankan culture, has on my experiences in Sri Lanka.

First, I would like to start by sharing a poem I wrote on the 11th of October 2009, entitled Sudu PaTe:
Never till now have I seen my true color.
Never till now have I had to wonder
how to hide
my very presence
that catches the eye.
And I wonder why
my skin brands me
and tells them what to see:
A foreigner on vacation
no need for speculation,
perhaps a whore looking for trouble
or a sudu who will pay double.
Both dangerous and exciting,
but why can’t they see what I see?
A young woman trying to keep her sanity
as she is paraded around like an elephant in captivity.
A circus act meant to be performed, unknowingly.
Constant stares and I am the sight, unwillingly.
Forced to stand out and asked to fit in
my skin bears the colonial sign of sin.
Pure as ivory but tainted with the past
How long will this racism last?

The title I chose for my poem, Sudu PaTe (or “white color” in English) is significant because this was one of the first things I learned in Sri Lanka. Within my first few hours in Sri Lanka, I had begun hearing the word “sudu” used to refer to me and my classmates. I asked our driver what “sudu” meant, and he explained to me that it meant “white” in Sinhala. I realized, before coming to Sri Lanka, that my skin color was very different from a Sri Lankan, but I never really thought this would be too much of an issue. I had studied in Morocco previously, and although my skin color definitely made me stand out, it was never really an issue. To tell the truth, I never really thought of myself as white, at least consciously, until I was labeled sudu in Sri Lanka. Americans are very diverse in terms of color, especially in Los Angeles where I live, and, although there is still much racism, I have never really paid much attention to skin color. At home, I have friends that are black, white, pink, yellow, brown, and all shades in between, and there has never been a problem. In fact, out of many of my friends, I have the darker skin, due to my Italian heritage, and therefore do not usually identify as “white” but “Italian”.
Not only is it hard to be stereotyped in a certain way, but I believe that skin color is the worst marker, because there is no way to hide or disguise it. I have joked with my host family about going out tanning or finding some darkening cream (as opposed to whitening cream used by Sri Lankans), but at times I really wish it were not a joke. I wish there was a way to hide my skin color, not because I am ashamed of having pale skin, but simply because of the stereotypes associated with it. In Morocco, if I wanted to adapt my identity to Moroccan norms, I would simply dress conservatively, and possibly put on a head scarf, but in Sri Lanka there is no way to hide the color of my skin. Because of this, I am branded as officially white and treated as such, following the stereotypes I explained above. While walking through the streets I am stared at, cat called, and giggled at. I have been videotaped by men with cell phones, had at least 6 different people take my photo without permission, and had thousands of kisses blown and tongues stuck out at me. I have been followed by men, hit on by men, and talked about behind my back and in front of my face, the people not knowing I can speak a bit of the language they use to insult me. While shopping, I have been ripped off because of my skin color, and have even overheard conversations between the shopkeepers about charging the suda more money. I have been followed and harassed by payment guides trying to make money off of the white tourists and have been surrounded by men looking for an easy lay. Never have I felt more claustrophobic and yet so alone while walking down an open street. I described my feelings to one friend in the States as having felt like a freak show on display at the circus, being ushered around to perform for an audience that is both scared and enthralled by you. I felt this way when a man at a temple snapped my photo as I listened to a lecture about the life of the Buddha. I felt this way when a monk puckered him lips up at me as I passed. I feel this way every day as hundreds of heads turn to watch me walk past, as if they have never seen a sudu before.
I believe that the staring and harassment is so bad, not only because of the fact that white skin is the minority and foreign, but also because of the culturally produced stereotypes that keep white women confined into a certain ideal. This racism comes from the media on TV and from the stories people hear, and is perpetuated by the dichotomy of West verses East, modern verses traditional, and immoral verses moral. The east sees the west, and all such things associated with the west, in opposition with their values and culture. Therefore, if the eastern woman is the ideal, the western woman is the antithesis of the ideal, and must be painted as such to portray the eastern woman in the correct light. Most people and societies use this idea of defining the other, because it makes it easier to define the self and create boundaries of control. However, defining the self and the other can be very dangerous if one does not understand that the definition is an ever-changing outline, not something to be stamped, approved, and filed away. Once the definition becomes stagnant, it hurts all parties, because no one is allowed to define themselves outside of the stringent definition already in place. And because of this, Sri Lankan women are passive homemakers, white women are whorish spendthrifts, and Sri Lankan men are expected to behave like animals controlled by sexual desires. Obviously, these are neither ideal nor true, so why do these stereotypes still exist? “How long will this racism last?” is the question I end with in my poem. I not only refer to the racism against white women, but also the racism created by this racism towards all other people. To me, this is an unanswered question for which I remain puzzled.